3 Ways High-Achieving Women Undermine Their Own Success (And How to Stop It)

You’ve got the title. The team. The track record. You’ve led launches, managed chaos, earned trust and yet, there are moments where you still find yourself questioning:

• “Do I really deserve this?”

• “What if I’ve just been lucky?”

• “What if this is the moment they realize I’m not enough?”

This isn’t about capability. It’s about how even the most competent women can quietly chip away at their own confidence.

Let’s name it: Imposter syndrome.

And let’s be clear: it doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means you’re human. Especially in systems and spaces where women are often expected to be excellent and invisible at the same time.

Ready to stop doubting and start owning your success? Schedule a confidential strength assessment to start rewriting your stories that holds you back and lead with clarity, confidence, and calm.

Here are 3 subtle ways I see high-achieving women undermine their own success and what to do instead:

1. You Downplay Your Wins

When someone acknowledges your leadership, your instinct is to say, “Oh, it was a team effort.” When you finish a major project, your brain’s already on what didn’t go right or what’s next.

Why it’s holding you back:
Minimizing your impact creates a pattern where you teach yourself (and others) that your success isn’t fully yours. It chips away at your internal confidence and external authority.

What to try instead:
Practice accepting praise without redirecting it. Try saying, “Thank you—that project was a real stretch, and I’m proud of how it landed.” It’s not arrogance. It’s ownership.

2. You Over-Explain or Over-Prepare

You’ve done the analysis. You know your numbers. But you still spend hours polishing that deck, just in case. You add extra slides, caveats, and disclaimers to make sure your point is taken seriously.

Why it’s holding you back:
It sends a message (especially to yourself) that your voice needs backup to be valid. That you have to earn the right to be heard over and over.

What to try instead:
Be concise and clear. State your idea, pause, and let it land. The silence after a strong statement is power, not a problem.

3. You Avoid Visibility Unless You’re “Perfect”

You hesitate to speak up in meetings unless you’re 110% sure. You don’t share wins on your social media because it might come off as “bragging.” You avoid leading initiatives that stretch you too far outside your comfort zone.

Why it’s holding you back:
Perfectionism feels safe but it’s keeping you hidden. And leadership isn’t about being flawless, it’s about being seen.

What to try instead:
Set small visibility goals. Share a win with your team each week. Speak up even when your answer is still forming. You’re building trust, not a resume.

So, what do you do when the mindset that got you here is the same one that’s keeping you stuck?

That’s where coaching comes in.

Working with an executive coach is about more than boosting your confidence, it’s about learning to trust your voice, own your leadership, and show up without apology. You’ve done the hard work. You’ve built something real. Now it’s time to feel just as strong on the inside as you look on paper.

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